


We Choose Each Other

by LeChatRouge673



Series: Cat's Song [13]
Category: Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition, Dragon Age: Origins
Genre: F/M, holiday fluff, satinalia 2017
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-16 11:32:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13053165
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LeChatRouge673/pseuds/LeChatRouge673
Summary: Mara Lavellan belongs to (and was graciously edited by) @slothquisitor, who also wrote a companion piece to this work. Mira Amell Theirin belongs to @welseykels.





	We Choose Each Other

**Author's Note:**

> Mara Lavellan belongs to (and was graciously edited by) @slothquisitor, who also wrote a companion piece to this work. Mira Amell Theirin belongs to @welseykels.

_Within, without_   
_We trust, we doubt_   
_To find, to lose_   
_We hurt, we bruise_   
_The hand, the heart_   
_An end, a start_

-“The Rules for Lovers” by Richard Walters

 

* * *

 

 

_Satinalia Eve, 9:43 Dragon_

 

It was still early. Not quite as early as they usual woke up and began getting ready for work, but near enough so as not to make all that much of a difference. The soft watercolor greys of morning light washed over their bedroom, a forgiving blanket of snow falling in its own unhurried time outside. Just as autumn had always been Theadosia’s season, winter had always been his, and this was the first year he had been able to spend it openly with the woman he loved.

She was still lying there, warm in his arms, somewhere between the fade and the waking world. Loghain knew she was not quite asleep because her lips curved up in the slightest hint of a smile when he leaned over and brushed a kiss against her cheek. “I’m going to go downstairs and start the coffee.”

“Mmmm, have I mentioned that I love you?”

“You might have,” he replied, slipping out of bed and reaching for a pair of faded flannel pajama pants and a well worn University of Denerim sweatshirt. “Of course, you say the same thing every time I make you coffee.”

Her eyelids fluttered open, storm blue eyes meeting his with just a hint of spark. “And I mean it, every single time.”

“I know,” he murmured, pressing a kiss against her forehead. “And I love you too, Theadosia.”

This prompted another soft smile before she allowed her head to fall back against the pillow, the tangled auburn waves of her hair obscuring most of her face. Loghain stepped quietly out of the room, careful not to trip over Johanna where she had taken up her customary place right in the doorway. Living with the cats had honestly been a bigger adjustment than living with Theadosia, but they seemed to be independent enough creatures, and even he had to admit that there was something oddly comforting about a purring feline settled on one’s lap in front of the fire.

He padded quietly down the hall, pausing briefly in front of the door to their home office. Loghain knew what was tucked away in his desk drawer, carefully concealed as it had been in various locations for the past five years; locked away ever since he had made the best, and then worst, decisions of his life. Which was really quite the accomplishment, given everything that had happened two years ago, but of all the choices he had made in life, the decision to leave Theadosia had been the most agonizing, and the one that had burned his soul the deepest. Part of him still wondered sometimes if he really had died, and that all of this was a dream he did not deserve.

The logical part of him, however, knew that it wasn’t, and it was that part that prompted him to enter the room and pull open the top drawer of his desk to retrieve a small box. He opened it, an utterly unnecessary reassurance that the ring was still there. It was a delicate band of white gold, and set with sapphires that ranged in hue from a deeper, grey tinged stone that reminded him of her eyes to a clearer, sharper blue that Anora had insisted matched his own. She had helped him pick each individual gem; had been so happy that he had finally come to his senses and was going to tell Theadosia how he felt; that he loved her, and that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with her.

And then everything changed.

 

* * *

 

_17 Justinian, 9:28 Dragon_

 

_The morning air in the mountains always seemed just a little bit cleaner; a little bit crisper than anywhere else in the world. Loghain was almost reluctant to leave the warmth and comfort of the tent, but he could smell the familiar notes of coffee mingling with the subtle summer scents breathing in from Lake Luthias, so he knew Theadosia was already up. Camping had been her idea initially, back when they had first started coming up here, and it was still a good one. It was one of the few times they could be together openly without worrying quite as much about anyone else stumbling on their relationship._

_Because that is what it had become, hadn’t it? Despite their promises, they had fallen in love with each other. Damn it, he had been half in love with her when they had started sleeping together, and it had only gotten worse the more time he spent in her presence. He was in love with Theadosia, and he strongly suspected that she was in love with him, but neither of them would make that admission. They couldn’t._

_Because that would mean the end._

_It had been almost three years since they had agreed that, whatever happened, their friendship was too valuable to lose if they became involved. That they would end things before it went too far. They had promised, and it had been a broken promise from the moment it had crossed their lips. Loghain had loved her even then, and he would have bet she felt the same way. He stared at her as he stepped outside, the chill of the morning a sharp contrast to the golden warmth of the sun rising over the mountains as it cast Theadosia in an aura of glowing light where she sat on a log overlooking the valley. After pouring himself a cup of the coffee that was brewing steadily on the camp stove, he joined her. When she offered him the corner of the blanket she’d been wrapped in he accepted it, pulling it up around his shoulder as she nestled closer to him._

_They sat quietly there, sipping their coffee and just watching the sun rise. Neither of them said anything; they did not need to. It was one of the things he loved about her. For all that she was a brilliant woman and he enjoyed their conversations, he appreciated that they could simply have these quiet moments as well where there was no inherent need to fill the silence._

_“Someday, I am going to build a cabin up here,” Theadosia finally announced._

_“Oh?” He asked, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “Have you already grown tired of the capitol?”_

_She shook her head slightly against his shoulder. “No, but it would be nice to have a place to run away to. Away from the city, and everything. Besides, the mountains are beautiful in winter, but it is not exactly camping weather. I want big picture windows that I can look out over the snow covered valley while there is a cozy fire in the fireplace, and a good drink in one hand and a good book in the other. I don’t know,” she sighed. “It’s probably ridiculous.”_

_“Oh, I don’t think it’s ridiculous,” he replied thoughtfully. “I have seen you balance books and beer plenty of times, although I will tell you the results become more amusing as the evening wears on.”_

_Theadosia gave him a gentle poke to the ribs. “That is not what I meant, and you know it. I just…” She paused, leaning away slightly so that she could look up and face him. “I love… I love this place.”_

_Loghain felt his heart twist at the meaning too poorly concealed beneath her words. He bent down and pressed his lips to hers. “I love this place too, Theadosia,” he whispered against her mouth._

_Damn their promise. When they returned to the city, he was going to tell her that he loved her, and that if she was crazy enough to agree to it, he wanted to marry her._

_But then, everything changed._

 

* * *

 

 

They had come home from that trip and he had spoken with Anora, who had dragged him to the jewelers and helped him design the ring he was currently holding in his hand. But then everything had started falling apart. Theadosia and her cousin, Cataline, had been promoted to VPs in the family shipping empire in preparation for taking over the company in a few years when Cataline’s parents retired. It was a much higher profile job, and their relationship would have been… if not exactly scandalous, certainly unconventional. And after Anora married Cailan, Loghain had truly believed that she would need him just as Maric had before. A level head to balance out the wild impracticalities and romanticized notions of monarchy that had been her husband’s downfall. Loghain had believed that he had a responsibility to his daughter and to his country.

And so he had left the woman he loved. Neither of them had ever said the words, exactly, but somehow she had known. The heartbreak in her eyes that morning had left a knife in his heart that had not been worked free until very recently. It had been a bittersweet relief when she had married someone else: it had at least relieved some of the guilt he had felt over breaking her, but in his own heart he knew that she had changed. Theadosia’s smiles became an even greater rarity, and the spark in her eyes had dimmed. He’d seen her once more after her wedding, at the funeral for Bryce and Eleanor Cousland. Then, nothing for over a year until death and grief brought them together once again at Cailan’s service. That had been the beginning of everything else falling apart, and yet… and yet it had also been the moment that he knew she realized he still loved her. That he had never once stopped loving her.

And to his shock, he realized that she still loved him, too.

“So. How long have you been holding on to that, I wonder?”  

Her voice was soft and still dusky with sleep, but she poured herself a cup of the coffee he’d made and settled carefully onto his lap, pressing a kiss to his forehead. Without even thinking about it, he slipped the ring over her finger on her left hand, holding his breath as he waited for her to say something. _Anything_.

“It’s beautiful,” she smiled, brushing a kiss against his lips. “I was beginning to wonder if you were ever going to ask.”

“I was trying to be tactful,” he grumbled against her skin as he leaned his head on her shoulder. “I was not certain if you would be ready, or if enough time had passed, or if you would even _want_ to get married again-”

“All choices that were mine to make, love,” she interrupted gently. “And the answer to all of them is unequivocally yes.”

Loghain breathed a sigh of relief, his lips tracing a series of kisses along the delicate arch of Theadosia’s neck as her fingers ran gently through his hair. “Marry me,” he murmured against her skin.

Theadosia gave a small laugh. “Wait here a moment,” she hopped off his lap and padded out of the room. When she returned, she was carrying a small box and a photo. She handed him the box first.

Frowning slightly, Loghain carefully opened it. Nestled inside was a band of white gold. Flawless on the outside, but engraved with a series of delicate stars on the inside where only he would know they were there. _She has always loved the stars._ He laughed quietly.

“And how long have you been holding on to _this_ , I wonder?”

She settled back onto his lap, her lips curved up in the familiar smile he knew was meant only for him. “I went and talked to Dagna the day after I brought you home. I figured that if you hadn’t asked by New Year I was going to. I am afraid I am not so patient as I once was.” She reached over and took the ring from its box and placed it carefully on his left hand, lifting his fingers to her lips and brushing a kiss across them.

“And the photo?” He asked, his curiosity getting the better of him.

Theadosia gave another small breath of laughter, then held it out so that they could both look at it. There, nestled on the shore of Lake Luthias, was a two-story log cabin with large picture windows overlooking the valley.

“You built your house in the mountains,” he looked at her and saw that her smile had widened slightly.

“I did, after my divorce was finalized. Big windows, fireplace, and all.” She leaned her head against his. “I wanted a place to run away to, and that place… it was always ours. I thought, I _hoped_ , that it could be again.”

“You were so certain I would come home?” He raised a brow at her and she rolled her eyes.

“I liked my odds.” She glanced at the kitchen clock. “So, here is what I suggest: if you’ll call your daughter I’ll call Nathaniel and see if he can drag Cat out of bed and over here, and then I’ll call Mother Gisele. She loves our family, and I’m going to bet she’ll be willing to make a house call. We still have a couple hours left before we need to start cleaning and baking for the party tonight, and it doesn’t take too terribly long to speak some words. Then tomorrow after breakfast you and I can drive up to the mountains and spend the rest of our vacation alone in our cabin with our cell phones turned off.”

Loghain stared at her for a moment. Sometimes he forgot how very, very quickly Theadosia’s mind worked. And once she set her mind to do something, it was nigh impossible to dissuade her. “Are you serious?”

She met his eyes, a challenge sparking behind the storm. “Are you?”

“Absolutely,” he cupped the back of her neck with his palm and pulled her closer, kissing away any question. “But, Sweetheart?”

“Yes, love?”

“If we’re going to get married this morning, you might want to put on pants.”

  

* * *

 

 

Thea was not one to let stress get the better of her, even on her worst days. She had a temper, no doubt, but it usually took something egregious to set it off. Stress showed weakness, and Thea did _not_ appreciate appearing weak.

That being said…

The morning had been perfect. She’d let Loghain talk her into breakfast at their favorite café, finished putting up the twinkling lights that bordered the living room, gotten married, and managed to find her favorite sweater that she was afraid she’d lost. Cat, Nathaniel, and Anora had all shown up only slightly cranky for having been dragged out of bed early, and the ceremony was brief and quiet and exactly what she wanted. Thea had done the big white wedding before but it had not been anything _she_ had wanted. It had mainly been to please her aunt and uncle, and this time she was perfectly happy to hold Loghain’s hands in hers as they repeated vows read by Mother Gisele in from of the Satinalia tree, the soft white lights glowing in cheerful affront to the grey, snowy morning. And this time tomorrow, the two of them would be in the mountains, away from the rest of the world, spending their first Satinalia together as husband and wife and probably not touching any of the books they’d packed.

In the meantime, however, reality had set in. This was, in fact, the first holiday that Loghain would be spending with her family and friends. Everyone had promised to be on their best behavior: they figured that if Cat and Nathaniel had accepted him, they could as well. Still, memories of what had happened two years ago still lingered, and so despite the faith she had in the people she loved, Thea worried. This was also the first year that Cullen and Mara would be there, and while Thea was thrilled that they had decided to spend Satinalia Eve in Denerim before spending the holiday in South Reach with his family, it still added a layer of stress and uncertainty to the day.

They had made the decision not to make any sort of announcement about their elopement, or even to say anything at all unless they were asked. It was not so much that they were hiding the fact; the rings on their fingers would probably raise at least a few questions, but they were also content to simply enjoy the peace as long as they could. As it stood, Thea was not exactly looking forward to having to explain what she had done to her fathers when they came back from their holiday. For that matter, she still had not exactly decided how she was going to tell Cullen. He’d known she’d gone back to Loghain: had, in fact, fully supported her decision. More so than some of her other friends, certainly. Still, she wondered if the fact that she had remarried would sting. She hoped not: she knew he was head over heels in love with Mara, and would be willing to bet money that it would not be too much longer before he was engaged again, but the tiny grain of doubt still worried at the back of her mind.

“Ok,” she exhaled deeply, planting her hands on her hips and surveying the kitchen. “I have the dinner rolls ready to go in the oven after Bull is done with the ham, the pies are in the pantry and the decoy for Sera is in the front… Josie is bringing the wine but I still need to make sure I have the coffee cups set out and the machine ready for after dinner, and I still haven’t wrapped anyone’s presents…”

The list continued on and Thea could hear her pitch increase in time with the tempo of her seemingly endless litany of tasks until she heard a quiet, familiar voice in the doorway to the kitchen.

“For the love of the Maker, _please_ go talk to your wife,” Nathaniel sighed to Loghain. “She is going to work herself into a fit if we’re not careful.”

Her husband nodded once, placing a grateful hand on Nathaniel’s shoulder as they passed each other before he turned his attention to her.

“Are you alright, Theadosia?”

“I’m fine,” she insisted, wiping a hand across her brow and realizing too late that she was probably now wearing a streak of flour. He gave her a small smile as he stepped closer to her, reaching for a paper towel and gently dabbing away the dust.

“Exactly how much coffee have you had today?”

“One cup fewer than I need, apparently,” she retorted, her hand reaching automatically for her cup, but before she reached it Loghain had his hands around her waist and had lifted her neatly up onto the counter, his arms locked on either side of her. She glared up at him.

“You are playing an awfully dangerous game, you know that, yes?”

“Theadosia Livia Mac Tir,” he murmured her name against her cheek, and she could not help but smile at the sound of it, “You are practically vibrating with what I strongly suspect is a mixture of caffeine and anxiety and not enough to eat. You have been running since 6:00 this morning and it is going to be a very long evening.”

“Your point?” She growled mutinously, glaring up at him as she subtly tried to reach her cup.

“My point, Sweetheart,” he replied with annoying calm as he caught her hand in his and lifted it to his lips, brushing a kiss against her knuckles, “Is that we can handle the rest of the prep work. If I’m not mistaken, Cataline is already upstairs handling the wrapping, which we both know you hate anyways. Nathaniel and I will finish setting up in the dining room. Go sit down, I will make you a cup of _herbal_ tea, and you can take a moment to breathe before the chaos starts.”

He leaned forward, his lips meeting hers, and for a moment Thea allowed herself to simply lose herself in his kiss. When they parted, she rubbed his nose affectionately with her own before dropping a whisper light kiss there. “You know, you may well be the only person alive who has come between me and my coffee and lived to tell the tale.”

“I’ll make it up to you tomorrow,” he promised, helping her hop down.

“Mmm, you’d better,” she leaned up and pressed her lips against his cheek. “And I will have the entire drive up to the mountains to think of creative ways in which you can do so.”

“Now you’re just not playing fair,” he protested, but she could hear the slight smile in his voice. “In the meantime, we have guests.”

“Alright, I have to ask,” Cullen chuckled quietly from the doorway, “How _exactly_ are you still alive? She takes her coffee _very_ seriously.”

“You say that as though it were a bad thing,” Mara Lavellan poked her head into the room with a bright smile. “Hey Thea. They cutting you off?”

“Apparently,” Thea raised an eyebrow before giving an exaggerated sigh. “I swear, you go through a few pots and they act as though you need a stint in rehab.”

“Utterly unfair,” the other woman agreed with a somber nod, while the men just shook their heads. Loghain and Cullen exchanged a warm handshake as Thea wrapped Mara in a hug.

“Come on,” Thea looped her arm in Mara’s and steered her towards the living room. “I’ve been banished from the kitchen, so we may as well go see if there are any other last minute tasks I can finish elsewhere-”

“Don’t you dare, woman,” Loghain called after her. “Mara, would you kindly see to it that she actually sits down? And would you care for some tea?”

“Please,” Mara giggled, settling opposite end of the sofa from Thea and tucking her feet neatly beneath her. “I mean, it’s not coffee, but I guess it’ll do.”

“Sorry you have to suffer for my crimes,” Thea laughed. “I have a really excellent blend for after dinner, if you can hold out that long.”

“I think I’ll manage,” she smiled. “How have you been?”

“Surprisingly good,” Thea replied. “Work is great, and the holiday season has been a lot more cheerful this year than it was last year. Everyone will be here, and happy, and for once life feels like it is where it is supposed to be, for a lot of people.”

“It does,” Mara agreed with a quiet nod. “Thank you, by the way, for letting Cullen and I crash your party. I know how much he’s missed everyone here, and it’s so good for him to get to see his friends.”

Thea tilted her head slightly. “Kitten, you’re not ‘crashing’ anything. You’re family, so of course you’re welcome here. We are just grateful that you and Cullen were willing to make the trip. Especially given how early your flight is tomorrow morning.”

Mara looked at her thoughtfully for a moment. “You really mean that, don’t you? It’s just, that easy?”

“Should it not be?”

The other woman shrugged. “It certainly has never been that way in my family. We’re not exactly close. I’m still a little floored by how you all have just welcomed me with open arms.”

“Mar, Cullen adores you, and you’re important to him. That means you’re important to the rest of us, including me. He’s serious about you: we all see it.” Thea hesitated a moment, then pulled the right arm of her forest green sweater off up and over her shoulder. “Here. I was going to wait until I could show both of you, but what the void.” She twisted on the sofa so that Mara could see the new lines of ink that graced her shoulder.

There was a moment of silence before Mara spoke, her voice barely above a whisper. “You didn’t have it covered up or removed. Cullen wasn’t sure…”

“Oh of course I didn’t,” Thea rolled her eyes. “Our marriage didn’t work, but that does not make him any less a part of my history. He is still my friend and he stood by me through some really tough shit, and I would no sooner cover up that lion than I would Sera’s bees or the serpent I have for Dorian.”

“But you’ve added to it,” she observed, and Thea felt a delicate finger trace the stark, geometric lines that formed the mountains behind the lion rampant. They were still fairly new: only a few weeks old. “You added mountains.”

“It’s where he found his home,” Thea replied quietly as she replaced the sweater and turned back to face Mara with a small smile.

“In South Reach?”

“With _you_ ,” she corrected. She reached out and gave Mara’s hand a gentle squeeze, tactfully pretending she could not see the faint sheen of tears in her friend’s eyes.

“Thank you, Thea. Really.” Mara offered a brilliant smile. “So, I kind of have to ask… how long have you been engaged?” She pointed to the ring on Thea’s finger.

“Ah,” Thea gave a small, wry laugh. “Well, strictly speaking, I’m not. I believe I was engaged for about eighty-seven minutes this morning.” She waited patiently as realization dawned on the other woman’s face.

“So… that means …?”

“It does,” Thea nodded carefully. “As of this morning, I am officially Theadosia Mac Tir. Well, on everything except my driver’s license. It takes _forever_ to get that changed. I would swear the department is staffed entirely by sloths, but I’ve never seen anything so cute in that office. I think they’re closed for the holiday anyway. Anora was able to sign off on everything else, which was nice. Although, she’s been holding her breath for this for five years, so…” Thea realized she was rambling, which she almost never did, and she took a deep breath to try to regain her composure, waiting for the judgement she was still afraid was going to come.

“Thea,” Mara stared at her before her face broke out in a wide grin, “That’s fantastic! Congratulations!” She leaned forward and gave Thea’s hand a warm squeeze, then examined the ring. “Oh, it’s so gorgeous… the stones match your eyes, don’t they? Both yours and his?”

“They do,” Thea released the breath she had been holding in a relieved laugh. “And thank you.”

Mara bit her lip slightly, and seemed to be debating whether or not she wanted to ask her next question. “You didn’t want a big wedding, did you?”

Thea shook her head. “I did not,” she answered emphatically. “The people who needed to be there, Cat, Nate, and Nora, were there. And Loghain and I have made our promises to each other: we did not need a big production to go along with it.”

“But you did before,” Mara pointed out.

“Yes, under duress,” Thea deadpanned. “That was mostly to please my aunt and uncle. Once was definitely enough.” She paused, then poked at Mara with her toe across the sofa. “What about you? You think you want a big white wedding?”

Mara laughed. “I think that will depend on what C-... my future husband wants. I always pictured something small, up in the mountains somewhere with just the people that mean the most to us. Probably somewhere between what you did the first time and what you did the second time.”

Thea nodded sagely. “Makes sense. And if I may be so bold,” she nodded towards where Cullen had just stepped back into the room to, “I suspect that is fair close to what he’d want too.”

They relaxed back into easy conversation as they sipped their tea: Thea asked about their trip up, and Mara asked about their plans for the rest of the holiday. She almost forgot about the rest of the party until the front door opened with a flurry of snow and complaints.

“ _Why_ do we insist on spending every holiday in the south?” Dorian grumbled as he kicked the snow off his boots before setting them on the rack by the door. “It’s damn cold. I am not made for this weather.”

“To hear you tell it, Kadan,” Bull replied good-naturedly, “You are also not made for rain, anything more robust than a light breeze, or temperatures that make the product in your hair melt.”

“All true,” Dorian sniffed, then turned towards the couch where they were sitting. “Teddy Girl! I hope Josie is bringing the good stuff: I need a stiff drink after being out in the cold for so long.”

Bull just shook his head as he headed towards the kitchen to start the ham. “Yes. A staggering thirty second walk from the driveway to the front door. Hey Thea, hey Mara,” he shot them a wide grin before ducking into the other room.

“Mara! We are so glad you made it,” Dorian strode over and dropped a kiss on Thea’s cheek as she stood to let him take her place on the sofa so he could visit with Mara.

“It’s good to see you, Dorian,” Mara grinned. “I have those books you wanted to borrow in my suitcase, so don’t let me forget to give them to you before we leave tomorrow morning.”

“Rest assured, I never forget to retrieve new reading material,” Dorian replied as he accepted a glass of wine from Thea. “Now, I had some ideas that I wanted to run past you about a new literary review for _Thoughts on Thedas_ …”

Thea left them to their conversation, greeting Sera and Dagna as they tumbled in from out of the snow, then Thom and Josie who were followed in short order by Leliana, Morrigan, and Vivienne. Zevran, Isabela, and Fenris all showed up together, and Cassandra and Varric brought Merrill since his sturdy station wagon was better in the snow than her car. Anders and Ven showed up shortly after, and soon the house was filled with the laughter and light that Thea had always associated with the holiday. Despite her earlier anxiety, she could feel herself finally starting to relax.

“So,” she heard a gentle, teasing voice coming from the floor near the Satinalia tree, which was undergoing the usual war of decorations between Morrigan and Vivienne, “I hear _someone_ was actually able to stand between you and a cup of coffee. I am honestly a bit surprised I do not have to drive anyone to the emergency room right now.”

Thea rolled her eyes as she settled down on the floor beside Cat, who was dutifully stroking Johanna’s inky black fur. Spying a new, unoccupied lap, Susannah took the opportunity to curl up with Thea, her bulk anchoring her effectively to the ground. “I could have taken him, you know that.”

“Only because you would have cheated,” Cataline giggled, leaning her head against Thea’s shoulder.

“Hey, I may be small but I am _feisty_ ,” Thea protested, but she couldn’t help but smile. Then, with a quiet sigh, “I appreciate you being here, Catkin. I know you had other options…”

Cat shook her head slightly. “Not really, Thea. It was nice of Alistair and Mira to invite us, but I think they knew I would never choose to be anywhere other than here for the holidays. And I know Mira tried to convince him to come over here, but,” she sat up and shrugged. “It is what it is, Thea. I love you, and much to my surprise I’ve found I even love Loghain too, despite everything that happened.” She glanced over to where Loghain and Nathaniel were deep in conversation with Thom and Josie. “I know you don’t think I knew… and maybe I didn’t, exactly, but I always suspected.”

“Apparently I was not as careful as I thought,” Thea cringed, and Cat laughed quietly.

“Thea, the fact that I _wasn’t_ certain, even though you and I are closer to each other than just about anyone else, is a pretty good indicator that you were damn careful. But I know you, Teddy Girl.” Cat looked at her thoughtfully. “I know exactly when he ended things, too. You showed up to The Hanged Man that night for your show and your makeup was absolutely flawless, and you never wear much makeup unless you’re trying to hide something. And then you sang “Hallelujah,” and it was the most heartbreaking thing I had ever heard in my life, save for maybe that last phone call from Nathaniel before he came back home. That was always one of my favorites, and you never sang it again until years later when Nate asked you to for me.”

“Yes, well,” Thea gave her a small smile, the memory still painful for the time that had passed, and the love she had now, “If it had been for anyone else…”

Cat pressed a kiss to her cheek. “I know. But it wasn’t just that: you never smiled quite the same after that, or as often which, for you, is saying something. And when I saw the two of you dancing at your wedding…” Cataline shook her head. “No one else would have noticed, I think, except maybe Nathaniel if he had been there, but like I said: I know you. You’re so finicky about letting people touch you, but you let him hold you with such absolute surety and trust. And there was a moment, towards the end of the song, when the two of you looked at each other… I know you and Cullen cared about each other, but looking back now, I should have known that _both_ of you were holding something back.” They both looked over to where Cullen had joined Mara and Dorian on the sofa, his arm wrapped easily around the elven woman and a quiet smile on his face.

“He’s found a peace I was never going to be able to give him,” Thea acknowledged. “Those two are perfect together. Have you bought in on the betting pool yet?”

Cat laughed brightly, clapping a hand over her mouth when Cullen and Mara glanced over at them, eyebrows raised in question. She lowered her voice to a conspiratorial whisper. “I have them engaged by Cloudreach of next year and living together by this coming New Year. By the way, Nate won the pool for you and Loghain.”

“I would say I’m surprised that you all had one going for us as well, but I am really not,” Thea remarked drily. “Nor am I surprised that he won.”

“Hmm, I’ll bet he cheated,” Cat pouted slightly. “The two of them have somehow become really good friends, which I still find utterly odd. Loghain probably told him he was going to ask you.”

“Nah,” Thea smiled, “We both know Nate doesn’t keep secrets from you. If he’d known, you would have known. If anyone had an advantage, it was you. You knew I was going to ask at New Year’s if he hadn’t.”

Cat gave an exaggerated sigh. “Oh well. I’ll do better with Cullen and Mara, I’m sure of it. Maybe if I offer to split the pool one of them will give me insider information…”

 

* * *

 

 

The house was calm, and the quiet was almost soothing after the joyful chaos of earlier in the evening. Cullen and Mara had been settled in the guest house down the hill, and Bull and Dorian were in the spare bedroom upstairs. Everyone else had gone home, leaving Theadosia and Loghain curled up alone on the couch sipping the peppermint hot chocolate she loved so much and watching the fire as it slowly burned itself down. She was half asleep, her head nuzzled against his chest. He pressed a kiss to her forehead, his thumb running a steady pattern along her shoulder as he held her close.

They had survived their first holiday together. Well, their first holiday openly together. Loghain knew that, despite her best efforts to the contrary, Theadosia had been anxious. He had felt guilty, knowing full well that it was his fault that there was any issue in the first place, but everything had gone smoothly. Nathaniel had pointed out that, even if someone had been put out by Loghain’s presence, no one was stupid enough to cross Theadosia in their home. This house was safe, for everyone that she opened its doors to. He was still slightly amazed that he had been allowed to call it his home.

In any case, everything had been fine. The fact that, for the first time in years, Theadosia had been radiantly and joyfully happy went a long ways towards thawing any of the chill the others may have felt towards him. Even Cataline, who should have had more reason than most to hate him, had pressed a kiss to his temple as they sat down to dinner and offered him a kind smile. They had all been kinder to him than he deserved, but he was grateful for it all the same.

Outside, the snow continued to fall in tranquil drifts, weaving its own hypnotic spell to rival that of the embers still glowing in the hearth: fire and ice. A trite analogy to Theadosia and himself, perhaps, but not necessarily inaccurate. Loghain shifted slightly so that he could glance down at her. “Theadosia? Are you awake?”

“No,” she mumbled, burying her face against his shoulder. He chuckled quietly before disentangling himself from her arms and helping her stand, her graceful limbs already heavy with sleep. They turned everything off downstairs, then made their way up to the bedroom and began getting ready for sleep.

“Just think,” she smiled as they climbed into bed and she nestled close to him, “This time tomorrow we’ll be up in the mountains, and I’ll have you to myself for a whole week.”

“I have to wonder what you did to deserve such a punishment,” he responded drily, and she laughed gently, tilting her head up to press a kiss to his lips.

“Obviously something amazing,” she whispered before she let her head fall back against his shoulder. “Happy Satinalia, Love.”

“Happy Satinalia, Sweetheart,” he allowed himself a sigh of contentment, feeling the steady rhythm of her heartbeat: his Theadosia. His life, his world, his everything… his wife.

_Happy Satinalia_.


End file.
